Fellas, just a quick reminder that what you see and what you interpret may be two drastically different things.

Gentleman, our ego can be a gift. However, it could also be a curse. A smile can be very misleading. It isn’t always an invitation for conversation. Ponder this! You and your guys are out on the town for a boy’s night out. You all enter a bar to have drinks. In the midst of mingling with others, a stunning young lady catches your eye. You smile, she returns your inviting gesture with a smile.

Now Mr. Ego steps in to, perhaps, cloud your judgment. Mr. Ego: “Did you see her smile at us? I’m telling you, dude, she wants us! We’re looking good! That new barber you went to today has us looking movie star-ish; if that’s a word? Bro, that new cologne we’re wearing is amazing. We’ve received three compliments since we arrived here. I’m telling you, she wants us!!!”

Guys don’t rush off to stake your claim on the top of Mt. Rushmore with the suggestions of your Ego. Sometimes a smile is an extension of a nonverbal salutation. Not an invitation to pursue a relationship or courtship, whichever comes first.

I’ve interviewed several women to ask them how they would dismiss a non-contender. They’ve given me a step by step description on how they would handle the situation. Here are a few of the signs!!

Example 1: “If he approached me I will firmly shake his hand after he introduces himself I would address him by his last name slightly giving him a cold shoulder. Then fully engage in a conversation with my neighbor. If he’s still lingering around I’ll dismiss myself from his presence, definitely acting a lil bougeois.”

Example 2: “I wouldn’t give anymore eye contact. If he approaches me, I will show no interest by ignoring or just not be receptive.”

Example 3: “I would make eye contact again on purpose. This time to give him that look with that slight head move like “what are you looking at”?? Then look away! I was only looking at you trying to figure out what makes you unattractive to me rather than attractive. You caught me, so I had to be polite and smile.  Usually I never get approached after that. Or if I smile, I quickly turn it into a disturbed look then proceed directly to my phone. “Like please don’t bother me!”. “

Example 4: “I would be sure not to make any more eye contact, and if he still decided to approach I would be short in conversation and maybe excuse myself to the bathroom.”

Example 5: “I’m very good at being non-receptive. Due to that fact, I never get approached by what I’m looking for. When all else fails I unleash my secret weapon. My CBF will probably stop him from coming over all together! Or make him think I’m a totally disturbed individual. Either way; it serves its purpose!!!”

In case you’re wondering…

Example 6: “Sometimes a smile is merely a smile. But more often than not, smiles are
misinterpreted. In the presented situation, I believe body language and the
tone of the resulting conversation would signify the lack of interest.
Females tend to give off signs of flirtation (sometimes without knowing) by
our posture, change in voice, and batting our eyelashes. When I know I
have no interest in a guy the conversation is totally relaxed and I end up
speaking to him as if he was one of my home girls. Most guys will pick up
on the tone and nature of the conversation and back off. There will always
be the few that can’t take a hint and those you just have to politely let
them know you’re not interested.”

Think long and hard gentlemen. If any of this sounds familiar to you, she wasn’t in to you bro!! I can almost guarantee you made a complete fool of yourself. Recognizing these signs will assist you in determining if the smile you garnered was propaganda or validity driven.